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Feeling difficulty in getting over something

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Assalamu alaikum brothers and sisiters.

Please help me out. I am a muslim who has never committed an indecency with any girl in any manner. But I knew this one girl who was a non muslim and also very spirtiual in her own relilgion and also very seducitve in her ways, but chaste. I had a lot of chances of kissing her touching her but i did not. Now we have had a very bad time since past few months and she has stopped talking to me since i wanted to get into a relationship with her. But she refused on the grounds that i am very possessive in nature etc..

We have stopped talking and now out of depression I have actually started perfroming salah regulalrly and looking into islam and seeking closesness to Allah like never before. But the regret that I did not commit zina or kissed her or committed some kinda of physical act with her when I had the chance is not going away. When I wake up in the morning I wake up with a tremendous sexual urge and regret of not doing this when I had the chance. Its been six months since those chances. but the regret is not going away. I know its not good to regret in this manner.


In fact once when I tried to, she pushed me away and said this is wrong and made me feel really bad about it. That was the last time she spoke to me 2 months ago.

I have decided to live an islamic way of life as much as possible Insha Allah. But this one thought keeps troubling me all the time.
Now I dont want to touch any other women with such intentions in my mind. But now I feel like dam..!! I lost that chance. And now that I know its wwrong I will never try to do it again. I am thinking of gettting married to a practising Muslimah as soon as I can. so that I can keep myself on the right path.

I pray sincerely and avoid all things and kill my nafs as much as possible. But the memory of the days and times when i could have touched this girl, kissed her or done atleast something is not going away. Its a really sharp sexual urge in the mind and body coupled with regret of not doing such an act..


I want to protect my chastitiy..This is such a conflict..

What should I do?

Please help me.

Jazkallah Khair

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